Let’s face it, kids don’t always feel grateful for everything they have. But just because they don’t feel appreciative every minute of every day doesn’t make them ingrates.

For better or worse, if you constantly nag your kids with lines like, “Do you realize how lucky, fortunate, or blessed you are?” they will eventually just tune you out.

An attitude of gratitude is something children need to be encouraged to practice without excessive pressure. In fact, if you can make “scavenging for gratitude” a fun activity each year, everyone wins.

You may be surprised to learn that your kids are more appreciative than you thought. And they may find that expressing what they’re grateful for isn’t as much of a pain as they’d imagined.

So go ahead—make gratitude games an annual habit every Thanksgiving season. Here are five ways to motivate your kids to dig deep and rediscover an inner well of thankfulness without feeling put out:

  1. Word Association
    Let kids create a mind map of words that represent moments, memories, or anything that comes to mind when they’re asked, “What am I most grateful for?” Family members can work alone or as a group. A parent can help a preschooler create a short, colorful list, while school-age children may do better with a number challenge like, “What are the top ten things you’re most grateful for this year?” Keep the activity quick, fun, and lighthearted. Don’t treat it like an essay assignment—unless you have a young writer in the family who would enjoy answering the question in essay form.

  2. Photo Safari
    Over the course of a fall weekend, give each child an hour with a digital camera or phone camera. Their assignment is to explore the house and yard, snapping photos of things that make them feel happy. These photos might include people, pets, nature, objects, places, and other things they love. Afterward, download a selection of each child’s photos into a collage format offered by your favorite local photo printing service. Have each child title the document in their own words, then hang the collages near the Thanksgiving table. Plastic or magnetic frames work well to protect and store collages for the next year.

  3. Appreciation Postcards
    Pick up some blank postcards and fine-point water-based markers from the art store. For younger children, parents can write names and addresses of family members in permanent ink on one side to prevent smudging. On the other side, ask your kids to write one word that describes something they appreciate about each family member, then decorate the postcard to match the sentiment. Make this an annual event, and family members will look forward to receiving their handmade postcards each year.

  4. Lessons Learned
    Life is a constant learning journey, and sometimes we don’t appreciate the lessons until later because the process is challenging, difficult, or painful. Discussing these kinds of experiences raises awareness of resilience in kids and teaches them not to shy away from challenges. About a week before Thanksgiving, start a round robin of sharing tough lessons learned during the past year. Rather than having everyone share in one night, let one person share each night at dinner, creating relaxed, reflective conversations. You may find your family swept up in some of the most educational and inspiring discussions of the year.

  5. Written on Stone
    Creating a thoughtful gift for someone else can inspire gratitude in even the grumpiest family member. Purchase enough large river stones from a garden shop or stone supplier so that each Thanksgiving guest will have one with their name on it. Be sure to pick up a few extras just in case. Wash the stones with soap and water, then let them dry. Paint the stones on the top, sides, and bottom edges in an array of autumn colors. Across the top of each stone, write each guest’s name in large letters using permanent markers or paint pens. Once dry, cut out words from old magazines that describe each guest and apply them to the rims of the stones with Mod Podge and sponge brushes. After the words dry, add one more coat to seal. When the stones are completely dry, cut and glue a piece of felt to the bottom. Use these stones as placeholders at the Thanksgiving table and enjoy the proud smiles.